Many a time, I am alone. I become alone. I am usually not lonely (referred to the feeling of loneliness). There is a being inside me. Almost all introverts like me would agree to this. When I am alone, I am with that being. I would call it as the insider (not the notable book of P.V.Narasimha Rao). The insider talks to me all the time. He never leaves me alone. When I did Yogic meditation in the mornings of 2007, over the terrace before going for work, i had him quiet. But not for many days. It creeps and crawls into the dark cellars of my mind probing something. I have no control over him unless I do yoga and meditation.
I know that if I send the above lines to any psychiatrist, he will simply prescribe drugs for schizzophrenia or obsessive compulsive disorder or bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder (these are some words I extremely am in love with). I am not making my web-life a psychopath's thrilling adventure-story. I have my musings. Thats all I wanted to convey.
My thoughts revolving around my being are very annoying. They are like buzzing bees. So to reduce the pain it gives, I type it down in my Cellphone's (Sony Ericson W700i) Notes application. So I have lot of notes inside my cellphone. Nowadays when i try to enter a new note, its saying 'overloaded and not able to create new notes. Please delete some'. The contents in the notes are elementary and not elaborated. They are in simple and precise sentences. For a particular subject there may be more or less 2 ideas. But when i try to get it down here, i may tend to elucidate upon them. I would like to pen them down in the coming days...
jo
